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We are recruiting writers again! - Page 5 - The Pokémon Academy Life Community

The Pokémon Academy Life Community

The official discussion forum for Pokémon Academy Life
It is currently Thu Mar 28, 2024 8:13 am

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 02, 2017 5:55 pm 
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Location: Spain
Good morning,

I would like to participate as writer of the visual novel. My name is Daniel Conesa, I am spanish and I wrote (in spanish) three novels of this genre, so I would like to join us

See you soon!

PS: My contact email is imbabbel14@gmail.com

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 08, 2017 8:20 pm 
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Location: PACA, France

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A French fan of Pokemon Academy Life, wanted to play more this game...
:D ;) 8-) :lol: :P :mrgreen:


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 08, 2017 6:22 pm 
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Location: Massachusetts, United States
I was wondering if one scenario could take place over more than one scene? For example, a scene could start with certain characters, and then transition into somewhere else, possibly at a different time or with different characters. Would this be allowed?

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Leaf is best girl. No ifs, ands, or buts.


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 09, 2017 1:18 am 
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Location: Canberra, Australia


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 09, 2017 9:01 pm 
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I see the news about the new map, with the chibis (tooooo cute :3 ).
So, can I make a story about the first time Red and leaf go to Inspira City or something in this case?

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A French fan of Pokemon Academy Life, wanted to play more this game...
:D ;) 8-) :lol: :P :mrgreen:


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 10, 2017 12:42 am 
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 14, 2017 11:06 pm 
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PostPosted: Sat Jul 15, 2017 6:49 pm 
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Ranger
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Joined: October 1, 2016
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Location: PACA, France

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A French fan of Pokemon Academy Life, wanted to play more this game...
:D ;) 8-) :lol: :P :mrgreen:


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:59 pm 
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Greetings esteemed writers. Rather than an immediate submission, I have come armed with some queries regarding whether there is any flexibility in how one qualifies for working on this project. Specifically, I s wondering if I could essentially apply by doing a re-write.

I am an academic reviewer and writer formally in the scientific community. Thus, by no means do I want to emphasise nor seek to particularly advertise my creative abilities in terms of writing. However, there is a shortfall in your project so far, I hope I could help ameliorate given my academic background. The basic issue I have, is that the academy is given far more prestige expressly than it is implicitly. The grandeur of the art certainly awards it prestige, but many of the characters lack the characteristics of people in similar circumstances within real prestigious institutions (personal experience bound of course). The first which stands out to me, is that of those who are hired. Professor Oak at least is in a very odd position for a couple of reasons. The first is a 'Macro' issue. This is because Oak is considered to be one of the intellectual might’s of the pokemon universe as well as your version of it, yet he is awarded a role as a 'form tutor'. I can see ways to adjust this macro positioning whilst preserving the value extracted in dialogue. Oak and the other professors are meant to be academically dominating individuals surely. I see the value in the daily encounters with them, but I think you lose some of the interest of players in these individuals in interacting so frequently and in such a menial way with them. This I imagine is also pertinent for progression in the story. Even within the shot journey I was exposed to, our protagonist is brought to meet the esteemed Oak which is psychologically a prestigious event indicating an elevation of our character from the norm. This I am sure will continue throughout, but will be all the more awarding if the professors are implicitly more imposing and impressive. The rework I would suggest would be making the professors leaders of great houses of pokemon research. You would retain your houses, and the morning meetings defined by such encounters and you can even have the professors doing respectively character impressing speeches and welcomes to the students. However, what you can preserve, is you can have them delegate the morning meetings (which are already significantly either information discourse or social exchanges between characters) to assistants or professors who are members of their houses so as to retain the idea that an illustrious professor is one who is awarded much time for research (as is the reality at almost any institution. On this front, I would like to do some work, on perhaps the opening speeches that professors do for their houses, taking account of their mannerisms that are thus far established, but more importantly to build them up to be real titans of the academic universe (which unfortunately I feel they are not at the moment in presentation).

This also allows me to bridge nicely on to the other key change I think needs to be made. Which is the general eloquence and speech mannerisms of Oak at least seem off. I understand that he is one with an intimate relationship with our protagonist and is often at least quite paternal. Nonetheless, I think he leans to heavily on the paternalistic side of his character when interacting with Red. A reminder of when you try to fish without water might tell us a bit about how stern Oak can be if nothing else... I think that it is important to remember that Oak has in significant part staked his reputation on bringing Red in and Red ought to appreciate that he needs to invest significant effort to meet these expectations slightly more. Perhaps remaining paternal is not the problem, but it is more an issue that I feel rather like Oak is awarding the main character too much lenience given that he is not an early teen in this universe and Oaks decisions are more consequential. The language barrier between Oak and other characters is also something I would like to see more emphasised. This can be either done through him perhaps being more verbose than the average character (though he seems socially able) or perhaps better though mention of Esoteric terminology so as to show he is a great distance apart from Red (and perhaps the player, though it would be hard to find something that pokemon fans playing this do not know of surely...) and perhaps even other professors.

As an experimental thought, I might even suggest experimenting with relative text speed to give the impression of quick wit and thought from Oak, thought admittedly this is an extraordinary step, otherwise it can be difficult to express differences in thought speed. Ellipses on behalf of the protagonist during a spoken portion from Oak could represent intimidation or processing time spent on the protagonist’s behalf, but I suppose this may also not be necessary. Either way, I would rather like it more for story purposes if Red felt slightly more overwhelmed post meeting Oak than smug. Hopefully this will make for intriguing character progression. In fairness, I don't know why specifically you want Red to be fairly confident post the meeting (or if I am interpreting things unusually) but I think the reticence he has would perhaps be better understood if the questions were more difficult (not sensible for gameplay reasons) or if the setting was more academically intimidating (which is what my suggestions are aimed at significantly). Perhaps Red should be more reticent to meet Oak also, though I admit I haven't invested as much thought into Red's cognitions as Oaks behaviour.

Just to summarise therefore, I would like to help out with this project. However, I want to help in adjusting the current way the project presents itself... specifically with regards to the institution and its torchbearers. For this reason, I thought it best to ask if you were remotely interested in my alternative ideas about how the institution should implicitly present itself before I essentially wrote an Oak (for instance) that would not be particularly in line with your current Oak.

Finally, if this is written in the wrong place, apologies. It is an application of sorts, but also not what you have asked for so please remove this if it is inappropriately located.

(Apologies in advance for mistakes)

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 17, 2017 11:58 pm 
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Joined: December 6, 2016
Posts: 65
So... let's talk about the characteristics of people in similar circumstances within real prestigious institutions (personal experience bound of course).

I'm not going to argue that all of the dialogue is perfect, and that it could not be improved upon, but I like the way Oak is handled in this game. You call him a form tutor, but that's not what his job is. Oak is there to teach you practically everything about Pokemon that isn't part of your electives. Yeah, he does some of the functions of a homeroom teacher, but the other 3 and a half hours are about teaching about Pokemon.

Just because you see a professor every day, doesn't mean that they can't be at the forefront of their field. But if we assume Oak is a prestigious and illustrious professor... isn't THAT an implicit way of showing how prestigious the school is? "Oh wow! This school is so good, they got Professor Oak, The Pokemon Professor, running my freshman homeroom class!"

As for Oak's speech patterns... I would argue that it is better that he is able to communicate effectively, without using esoteric terms. Remember, people who study pokemon are a lot like biologists in the real world, and scientists tend to be more casual. Not only that, but using big words is not a sign of intelligence... it's usually the opposite. Dumb people, or people who feel the need to sound smart, use big words to imply that they are smart... whereas smart people don't need to, because they are smart. This also relates to a teacher's ability to teach: "You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother". I would argue that this great, brilliant biologist don't need no big, fancy terms, because he's smart, and a good teacher... one worthy of a prestigious school.

Oak's familiarity with Red makes sense... even a professor can have friends, and doesn't need to be "on" all of the time. He knows Red very well, and probably sees him like a grandson (heck, probably more than a grandson, as Oak actually remembers Red's name). This isn't Red's first time meeting Oak, so it doesn't make sense to have the first meeting in game be all elaborate and for Red to be apprehensive. Don't forget, Oak's specialty is studying human/pokemon relationships. It would make sense that someone who studies they way beings interact with each other, would be good at being able to interact with beings. That's not to say that Oak is perfect, and may use a esoteric world every now and then, but that shouldn't be the norm for him.

Your idea about having houses is interesting. How do you think that would work? Are you thinking of it in a Harry Potter way, or more in the sense that a university has several schools within it?


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